"There are skeletons in there." - DM
"Are they alive?" - Chiru
"I want you to tie me down." - Yugar
"What be-ist thy alignment?" - Erystelle to Auslin
"This sounds like a job for the Talons of the Beast-Tamers!" - Solannus
"It's only a baby Tarrasque." - Sargon
"You zany outlander, you!" - Solannus to Chiru
"We killed him so good we should get experience for his kids!" - Auslin
"I'm STILL holding my wand!" - Chiru, referring to his lightning wand
"You hit a wall." - DM
"I open it!" - Sargon, in "Tarassque" form
"I'd drink you under the table but you start under the table." - Solannus to Yugar the Dwarf
"Could you supply us with some magical items?" - Chiru
"Oh would you stop begging!?!" - Yugar
"If you pocket the High King, I'll kill you myself." - Auslin to Tempus
"I assume you worship Good?" - DM as Father Landon
"Actually, we worship well. We hope to do better." - Solannus
"He's a man of the cloth. He doesn't lie." - Erystelle
"Actually, I'm not that holy. But, I'm not lying now." - Solannus
"What's the cost range?" - Auslin to Bog's clerk
"Anything from 100 gold pieces to your very soul." - Solannus
"First you want to be tied down. Now you want to ride him!" - Erystelle to Yugar, regarding the Tarassque' Sargon
"There's a large creature holding you. He won't rip your arms off unless we tell him to." - Solannus to Shelzza, referring to Tarrasque Sargon
"Well, I might start wearing a dress." - Solannus, referring to Shelzza's dress/magical armor.
"We're a circus. Seriously. We have a dwarf. We have a sword wielding maiden. If I don't look like a circus act, who does?" - Yugar
"Any helpful or strategic hints before we go into this battle?" - Auslin to Tobias
"Yeah, avoid the sword of soul-sucking!" - Sargon
"One problem... if we send the bird up and it's a monster, the bird will get eaten." - Chiru
"Oh, but sending Tempus is okay." - Solannus
"As a general rule, Chiru, don't do anything!" - Tempus
"Oh, go stick your sword up your anus!" - Tempus
"I did that! That's how I lost one of my lives." - Erystelle
"You would soil yourself playing with yourself but not playing with us." - Erystelle
"You are a most unique being. I find you most fascinating. I mean that in a complimentary way." - Erystelle
"He committed suicide by natural causes." - Sargon, about Tempus aging himself
"What is bail set at?" - Erystelle, inquiring about Tempus's incarceration
"Fifty-thousand gold pieces." - DM (as warden)
"Is it really worth it?" - Erystelle
"This is a lame jail. Lock me up, and I'll get my ass out too!" - Erystelle, referring to the jail's quality
"I would like to point out that, in a court of law, that would not have been cause to beat the shit out of me." - Tempus, in his defense for being assaulted after aging himself
"Where are they?" - Tempus, about his missing comrades
"In the spiritual realm." - DM (as priest)
"Is there any way to get there quickly, like Fed-Ex?" - Tempus
"Spirit-Express, when Lathander absolutely, positively has to be there overnight!" - Yugar
"You used to be able to take a joke! You used to be cool! What happened man?" - Erystelle to
Solannus
"Have you been corrupted by society?" - Jezreel
"I get down on my knees, pray to Lathander, saying it's for the good of the realms..." - Tempus,
taking a holy symbol from a dead priest.
"... And you rob a dead priest." - Sargon
"He's not going to need it in the other world. He can't take it with him." - Tempus
"Aw crap! We have to go through Hell to get there!" - Sargon, looking at the map and seeing that they'd have to journey the Zhentil Keep Dungeon Torture Room, described as "Hell"
"According to my spells, he wasn't there!" - Yugar
"According to my psionics, he wasn't there!" - Sargon
"According to my common sense, he wasn't there!" - Jezreel, regarding the Erystelle-praising
Elminster, conjured by Erystelle
"Get me some Old One Eye, guys!" - bereaved Erystelle
"Because some days are shittier than others." - Tempus
"Tempus! Stop chasing the drake away!" -Sargon
"I can psionically wrench him and here I am banging on an invisible force-shield." - Yugar,
referring to the extra-planar creatures killing Tempus.
"You can see out finely honed battle-sense." - Sargon
"Have you been probing me?" - Sargon
"I don't do that to members of the same sex." - Yugar
"It appears to be a brasserie." - DM, actually meaning brazier.'
"I'm not a clone, dammit!" - Tempus
"We've figured out the first level version of Power Word: Kill... the components are a potion of Dragon Control and a red dragon." - Yugar
"Tobias is back. I had gotten used to life without psionics." - Tempus
"We're in the middle of a damned forest. Who needs to be tactful?" - Erystelle
"We can't kill him, really." - Erystelle, about Amarin
"Why not?" - Tempus
"Well, it's just not right." - Erystelle
"He said he wanted to be dead. We're just helping him." - Tempus, about Amarin
"Who are you? Jack Kevorkian?" - Erystelle
"You know, if you capture it, you can make plate armor out of it. I read it in a fairy-tale book." - R'llathnillarian, about Tarrasque Sargon
"Are you a were-tarrasque or something?" - R'llathnillarian to Sargon
"Okay, I cast light on my rations." - Erystelle
"Rations-lite!?!" - R'llathnillarian
"Did you cast Feeblemind on yourself?" - R'llathnillarian
"Huh?" - Erystelle
"Maybe if you just work hard and do a good job, he might let you go free." - random salesperson, about the Phaerimm that put the party into slavery.
"Let me tell you about the time I went to the Seven Heavens..." - Erystelle
"I was on cloud nine once." - Sandalar
"I got a 96, or a 69, depending on how you look at it." - Andy, after rolling dice
"69 is always better." - Rich
"Yeah, we were doing that the other day but I don't know why." - Jeff
"My, aren't we pompous already, Mr. I-Saw-God!" - R'llathnillarian to the newly converted Tempus
"You have the most fucked up ethics I've ever seen." - R'llathnillarian to Sargon
"My god is the Phoenix, a giant flaming bird." - Erystelle to a guard
"Well, large, not giant." - Yugar, who will shape-change into a phoenix
"Giant compared to a finch." - Erystelle
"You're fucking someone!?!" - R'llathnillarian
"Shhh!!!" - Erystelle
"How did you get the money?" - Rich
"I was thinking they would make a good wedding gift to the Sultan." - Darien
"Oh yes! A toaster, a microwave, and a shiny new Ettin. Just what every bride wants!" - Bob
"Could you lightning strike the entire area?" - Darien
"I'm not that impressive..." - Bob
"No kidding!" - Darien
"I didn't just kill him. I burned his head off!" - Bob, regarding his slaying of Maxarian
"You realize we try to keep order in my little... duke-dom." - GM (Rich)
"You see a balor standing in front of you, surrounded by flames." - GM (Rich)
"Oh, am I supposed to be scared?" - Reed, making hand-jerk motion
"If someone is good at healing themselves, I can Life Drain them for myself." - Romulus
"I think... change, change. I think about having breasts." - Kitava, hoping to trigger the unknown power of his magical armor
"I don't have to turn around. I can form a fist out of my technicolor butt!" - Aelforth, in response to a possible proctology exam
"Tell her if she gives you the jewel, you won't file for custody." - Reed, to Sargon about the Dantar Jewel which the Amethyst Dragon is wearing
"I don't like parties very much. They always seem to drag on." - Sargon to woman, who is actually Amethyst Dragon, mother of his children
"Remove your shoes! You're standing on chaotic ground!" - Alhamen (Rich)
"I take my shoes off." - Aelforth (Andy)
"Now, put them on your hands!" - Alhamen